My 2012 Prayer

 

I'm not sure why people wait until January 1 to make goals/new year's resolutions, etc.  I kinda feel bad that I don't focus on this all year round.  But I'm like a lot of people in that I make goals at the beginning of every year.  I think it's a good thing to write down your goals.  Studies show that if you write them down, you are more likely to attain them.  Eric and I have coffee at the beginning of every year and discuss our goals-our individual ones and ones we have as a couple.  Today I was reminded of a few of my spiritual goals.  I was reading a chapter in this amazing book that my cousin, Brandi got for me when I first told her I was pregnant.  The book is called Prayers for Expectant Mothers.  As I was reading today's chapter, I started tearing up because I want to be the woman it talks about so badly.  I'll read an excerpt from today's chapter:

"More than a pregnant glow, I want a light that cannot be hidden. A light that burns brightly. A light that can be seen from a distance and draws others in. I want to be a light in the darkness. A beacon that guides others to you. So many things threaten to hide my light. Sin. Complacency. Self-centeredness. Lord, I can be such a dim light at times. I confess that left to my own, there is no light to burn. Try as I might, I cannot muster even a flicker on my own. I am a shadowy grave, except for Your grace. Fill up every dark place with the radiance of your presence.

Replace my complaining with worship. Exchange my gloomy doubts for an enduring vision. Convert my pitiful worries into righteous confidence. Abide in me. Change me. Use me. God, please do whatever it takes to brighten the light inside me. Because of Your mercy and because of Your presence, I shine. Amen."

 Wow, that is so powerful!  Lately, I've felt like I'm stuck in a place I don't want to be-a place of complacency maybe.  So as I read this today, I just started sobbing because this is the type of woman I want to be. And I know I can be through Jesus Christ's grace and through His power.  As I start out 2012, I'm thankful first of all that the Lord has forgiven all my sins. Second, I'm determined to become the woman God wants me to be.  I feel that 2012 may be a year of refining for me, and though it may be difficult at times, I'm thankful that God loves me too much to let me stay the way I am. My desire is to become more like Him-to love more, forgive more, and to have a heart of joy and compassion.  I'm excited for what this year is going to bring.  How about you? What are you looking forward to in 2012?